Me Tablet

Me Tablet

Self-absorption like a tablet soaked with words in tiny print expanding

Swelling in a loud mouth circumference as the circle expands

In these domestic waters of red tides the message clearer in time

Washing in a hired burial crew to this shoreline to shovel off to silence

Constantly monitoring, on high alert, thinking the answers

Are everywhere else, but entwined in this energy I assume I exert

Pretending and living a line about why

I deserve to bury skeletons

With the help of a crew, tattling on about yesterday

Building this casket beach, seeing the blisters on her hands breach

The surface of our conversations in apparent snippets of dissatisfaction

Assumption of a genesis beyond my nexus of control

Blame her pain on my pain, a common enemy like a reprieve

From seeing the mirror in my name of not connecting with all she has been fretting

Like an absent voter thinking his proposition passed as if there was no need to campaign

I thought success was aligned, just a hard truth in between the lines

Of a pain and a pain, a pain and a joy, imbalanced and repeat the same

Mistake like a common complaint, spending so much time in the confluence

Of my own thoughts I think, I think, I must be truly lost

Out in this superego wilderness, defense mechanisms to protect all of this

Conjecture that what I want to give, is actually given or appreciated in the limits

Control like a handicap of letting go of that doubt linked-up like an ankle bracelet

Tethering to me what I can not face, I do not really know how to be there for someone else

When I can barely take care of myself, I need to deplete this grief at my feet

Like dusts passing in the gusts of the air moving as front doors welcome visitors

Open and swing that portal, until the arms ache and the smiles break without novelty

My heart ill with want for her and on the hunt, failing to see the injuries inflicted

In the birdshot, tattered wings and this is not joyous

Apologies too late to see the oblivion in me, unconscious of this lack of progress

Sorry for prolonging the inevitable with my seed forgettable

Assuming the blooming underneath was consuming a greater part of her heart

Did not mean the pain with these continued refrains to request her returning

To a grave yard of tasks sickening her will to see the smile of an autumn breeze

With the reprieve of unrestricted movements in the seasons

I am sorry I was not what I thought I was to you and was what I was

I pray for your happiness moving forward and the pixie dust to shed

From my myopic sense of self compliments, these flaws like laws

Propositioning my own immunity, my gratitude for arresting me

Maybe now I can do my own work and you can breathe