Monday, July 21, 2014

Breaking Down Again


If not her, then who God?
I am doing my best to remain open
To release those who wish not my attention
I called in every direction I could muster

Promise stood tall on the horizon
We have to some degree acquainted in the moonlight
The silence returns like a sting
I am draining

Doubt washes over the levees
Gurgling hope bubbles naught
The heavy ankles swell leaden clods
I cannot be this lap dog in pursuit

Snapped away at the snout
With no effort to assert the other’s vulnerability
The numb ache is at the gates
With a mirror of acne and limbs reaching to the sky

I just want a partner for this life
One person, kind and beautiful to each other
Always been, too much to ask, too hard to find
Boy, go back to the corner.

It’s not that God doesn’t give a fuck
It’s that you were right the first time
God doesn’t exist

You wanted to feel the divine presence
As some kind of ubiquitous component of all
Neither instigating, saving, or condemning
Merely, an aspect of acknowledgment one could choose

Contingent on volition of beings and the science of atoms
So very cold, the surfaces, praying for kindred
If not her, then who God?
About to break down again, hoping for fuel, wondering


How much for a gallon this time?

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