I have spent everything I have to participate in a conversation
Where
the other party understood a damn thing I said after minute forty-seven
I
would rather not talk most of the time, just keep quiet, listen, assess
Most
of life does not require speech, so I choose not to utilize speech
People
seem to always be staring at me like I have to start the conversation
I
am exhausted from being looked at that way; I would rather stare at a wall
Be
alone or slice my toes open with a letter opener slowly over the course
Of
eighteen weeks
The
others I get the same in return, no one talks back
The
irony of life is that anybody you actually want to have a conversation with
Avoids
talking with you as if the very power of their existence
Is
created by their subconscious knowledge that you wish to converse
Yet,
they are disallowing this transaction to occur
Therefore
one is left to silence, all the while speaking inside their skull
The
other is off to other people trying to talk to them whom they are being ignored
by
The
powers of the world shift in such ways
No
one really talks to anyone, except on rare occasion where these roles become
confused
In
the melee exchanges where we try a divergent pattern
I
think I might have had six or fourteen actual conversations in my entire life,
And
at least a third of those I think it was only a conversation on my end
The
other person was testing it out and decided half-way through to quit
participating in full
In
turn I am most certain that others would tally a conversation with me, wherein
I
was most un-present for some measure of the duration
So
the events are probably discounted on the grand scale of accountancy
So
if you add it up on the Earth right now there are probably
One
and half trillion conversations out of say six trillion people
Actually
believing they are speaking or communicating
This
is about average and out of that
Most
is not retained or remembered or recalled to
Preponderance
so the sounds, the echoes, the blank noise distorts and amazes me
How
anyone really speaks to anyone ever
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