Alchemy and Chemistry

Having others do for me feels like chemicals

Each insinuation is barter soaking in the indoctrination of alchemy

The ancestor of mathematical acumen costumed in the mystique

That a human requires a poltergeist therapist-phantasm to navigate

Acquiring stores and processing grain and mead,

Or cleanly stoves, and wash basins 

The marketplace suggesting the up-size, the bait

The switch to the torso in that God is embodied into spouse

The idea of husband or wife creating dependence

Reliance in the rope and the pulley for the simple machine of empathy

That one sailing can hoist the sheet to the mast to write one’s story

Projected like a movie screen in bolt typeface to assert identity

That I am man embodied in individual

Accredited to steer by volition that I need not these whispering heavens

But I am courageous enough to accept the love of woman

And her loveliness is not the allotment of deity

But of the chance amalgamation of star dust coalescing in genetic ballet

To surge choice into continuing the dance that I am worthy partner

In these jostling midnights, I am the pheromone of coming home

I am the water for the horse at journey’s end

Yet we are blocked by the idea of this ghost

Cackling in societal construction, waiting to be kidnapped in sad-sack night

With Rah, Zeus, and post-pubescent Santa Claus

That she asserts you under the ticker symbol of Jesus

And all I see is the universe

In her eyes gazing back at me in shackles of a crumpled novel

Masquerading as sacrosanct tome full of wrath and compassion, thorns and ascension

Enough

I have tried so very dearly to love you and love I do

But no matter how close upon this mattress I press to your skin

There is still this dead-man between us watching in the corner

I feel his gaze in your vulva, permissions in your kiss

This heart beats in the wake of my catamaran staring at the stars attempting chemistry

Beakers and goggles inside a hurricane mixing fluids

We both want to shake sense into the other

Knowing the intimacy we seek would destroy our beloved

Knowing we must set course for divergent islands once more