Thursday, November 29, 2012

My post-modern Ignatius Riley Impression of the Day

My post-modern Ignatius Riley Impression of the Day  

If I believed in swearing to God,
I would pledge on the day I get to quit my job to smash
the Okidata line-printer used outside the door of my office
to vomit rural utility billing statements from DOS software
with a sledge hammer and stomp the crap out it in the parking lot
like in Office Space for the hell it has railed on my ear drums
while trying to subdue my rage as a lame-ass CPA in nowhere Louisiana.   

A pox on the foul printer! 
Nazgul ring wraiths be a better lullaby!
You are drowning out Bob Dylan's Song to Woody!
May the archaic software that demands its vile cacophony combust! 
 
Where are the angelic hackers to quell this foul screeching harpy
from my orchestration of account groupings
of the public safety paragons of the Livingston Parish Sheriff’s Office?   

Oh, my New Orleans
we will reunite under the bridge of your river and
reconcile the horrors of the great wasteland! 

Bring me home!

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