Sandy Glitter

I just needed a love affair

I felt like we were each on a plate

And I ruined it with not understanding the question

I needed to rebuild and enjoy the season

Time slipped and I cannot handle it

How close we were to tearing off the shell of every inhibition

Of adolescent speech torn and lover’s breached

The prisons I have held myself in behind all this mad poetry

She was liberation in glitter and all I had to do was keep my mouth shut

Love and not tattle on my heart wanting to fall like a portcullis

Barring me in like a cold mask from burning this ropes

God damn you God you give me an outlet and all I did was ask for love

I want another change and my body is bubbling in frustrated antiquity

Walled in and bursting in sexual frustration

I thought the moment was there on the cusp  

All these ancient seashells have slipped through my hands 

I wanted convalescence for my heart

I got a woman who mocked love teased like a chew spine

Made me feel ashamed for having feelings despite her saying she was starting to have feelings

The cruelty of ironic destinies of wanting a partner to claim me

For who I am in heart, for who I am in heart

I would have given her it all and see what stuck

Oh the disaster in the wanting;

Makes me feel like a gum wrapper buried in the beach glittering for a sea gull